Benefits of Using Mental Health Professionals in a Divorce

Divorce is a legal process; that’s why most people work with lawyers to get the best possible outcome. But divorce isn’t only a legal process. It’s an emotional one as well. Accordingly, it makes sense that there is a place for mental health professionals in divorce as well. So why don’t more people work with mental health professionals in a divorce?

Part of it may be the stigma that has long been attached to mental health issues. Fortunately, that stigma has begun to fade. But it’s just as likely that many people don’t understand the many benefits of using mental health professionals in divorce. Sure, it’s possible to get through a divorce without mental health support. But having the right kind of help can make divorce much easier—not only for the divorcing couple, but for their children, as well. And it can help the attorneys achieve a better outcome for everyone.

When are Mental Health Professionals Helpful in a Divorce?

Divorce is, by definition, a time of transition and even upheaval in the parties’ lives. Anyone going through a divorce and is feeling stress, sadness, worry, anger, or grief can benefit from working with a mental health professional. (That’s pretty much everyone going through a divorce.)

Mental health professionals help their clients develop the skills to deal with transitions and changing relationships. The truth is that almost anyone facing a divorce can benefit from that kind of support and guidance. That said, there are certain situations when the services of a counselor or other mental health professional can be especially helpful, including:

• High-conflict divorce situations
• When there has been emotional, physical, or financial abuse in the marriage
• When child custody is a contested issue in the divorce
• When parents are concerned about the impact of divorce on their children
• When one or both spouses are experiencing overwhelming emotions such as anger and grief that make them feel “stuck”
• When either spouse has a history of mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, or post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)
• When a child of the divorcing couple seems to be struggling or exhibiting signs of mental health issues
• When the court has concerns about the welfare of the children in a family
• When one or both spouses are using unhealthy coping mechanisms, such as abusing drugs or alcohol
• When one member of the family has a diagnosed personality disorder

Depending on the circumstances, it may make sense for spouses to consult a mental health professional together. For instance, divorcing spouses who want to be able to co-parent effectively together might do well to consult a family therapist together. On the other hand, some situations call for individual meetings with a counselor, such as when there has been domestic violence or a serious power differential in the marriage.

What if you are in a situation in which you think it would be beneficial for both you and your spouse to work with a counselor, but your spouse isn’t willing? In that case, it’s better to seek help on your own than to try to force your spouse to participate. You can always share insights you have gained, if appropriate.

Sometimes, it’s not only the divorcing spouses who most benefit from using mental health professionals in divorce. Remember that your child is also experiencing divorce as you go through it, from a different perspective. If you are struggling yourself, you may not be able to offer your children the support they need. Seeking help can give you the tools to help your child, and connecting your child with a therapist allows them to express their feelings and get support from someone other than a parent.

What Kind of Mental Health Professionals Can Be Helpful in Divorce?

“Mental health professional” is a broad term that encompasses professionals with various types of training, including:

• Psychiatrists, who have a medical degree and can prescribe medicine
• Psychologists, who usually have a PhD or PsyD
• Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSWs)
• Licensed Professional Counselors (LPCs)
• Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFTs)
• Mental Health Counselors
• Substance Use Counselors

Most, but not all, mental health professionals have some type of licensure in their field. While it is not necessary for a professional to have a license to be effective, working with a licensed professional offers the peace of mind that they are subject to some kind of professional oversight.

What Roles Do Mental Health Professionals Play in Divorce?

One obvious role a mental health professional may play in a divorce is serving as a counselor to one or both spouses, a child, or the entire family. But beyond providing therapy, there are many roles a mental health professional might play in a divorce.

For instance, a professional might serve as a divorce coach, perhaps in the Collaborative divorce process. A divorce coach’s role is specifically to help clients navigate the divorce process, providing support in decision making, setting and maintaining boundaries, and developing effective communication strategies.

Another role a mental health professional may occupy is that of parenting coordinator. A parenting coordinator is specially trained to help parents co-parent effectively during or after divorce. Parenting coordinators help parents work through and resolve conflicts before they escalate, and may help mediate minor disputes so parents don’t have to seek a resolution through the courts.

Mental health professionals may also serve as child custody evaluators in contested cases. These professionals perform in-depth analysis of a family’s situation and parental strengths and challenges and report back to the court to help with decision-making. It’s most common for the court to request the involvement of mental health professionals as child custody evaluators, but parents can agree on their own to use a child custody evaluator, or for one parent to ask the court to appoint one.

Work with an Experienced Maryland Family Law Attorney

It’s important to make sure your emotional needs, and those of your children, are met during your divorce. If you would like to learn more about the benefits of using mental health professionals in a divorce, a family law attorney can help you decide the type of support that might be best for you. To learn more about divorce in Maryland, Virginia, or D.C., contact Strickler, Platnick & Hatfield to schedule a consultation.