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Divorce can be a chaotic time and you might consider doing or saying things you normally would not. While many people tend to make more emotional and rash decisions as they go through the divorce process, it’s important to keep in mind some divorce do’s and don’ts. Although it might be easier said than done, it’s vital to think before you act in a divorce. The actions you take today can have a lasting impact on the outcome of your case.
Just as there are some things you shouldn’t do in divorce, there are also many things you should. By adhering to the following guidelines, you will not only be proud of your behavior, but also make things easier for yourself and your family in the long run:
Marriage isn’t only an emotional relationship. It’s also a legal and financial one. When you are going through divorce, it’s crucial to have a knowledgeable divorce attorney by your side who can help you navigate the legal process and protect your financial interests. Trying to represent yourself can lead to costly pitfalls.
Do be honest with your attorney, even if you have to share facts that might not be favorable to you. Your attorney needs to know the truth so they can develop a strategy in your case and anticipate any challenges that might arise. In addition, concealing information from the court can lead to monetary fines, loss of credibility, a worse financial outcome, and contempt of court.
Unlike what is portrayed on TV or in the movies, divorce is not about who wins or loses. It’s about compromising. Finding a reasonable middle ground can result in a faster and easier conclusion.
Litigation isn’t the only way to divorce. Mediation and the collaborative process are two alternative dispute resolution methods that can allow you to part ways with your spouse cost-effectively, amicably, and efficiently. These methods can help you remain in control of the outcome of your case and find creative solutions to the issues in dispute, rather than let a judge decide them.
Document everything you think might be important during the divorce process, especially when it comes to child custody matters. Keep a journal of dates and events if your attorney advises you to do so.
Divorce might be one of the most emotionally challenging experiences you have in your lifetime. It’s important to get the emotional support you need as you go through the legal process and move forward to your next chapter. A therapist or mental health professional can help you process your emotions and assist you with developing healthy coping mechanisms.
No matter how contentious you are with your ex, the best interests of your children should always come first. Do remind your children that both parents love them and they are not the reason for the divorce. Keep their routines the same, shield them from conflict, and encourage them to share their feelings with you. Be sure to focus on making child-centered decisions with your spouse, rather than focus on your grievances with each other.
Under normal circumstances, most people would never need to think about the following. However, during a divorce, common sense often goes out the window due to heightened emotions. The following are some “don’ts” to keep in mind as you go through the legal process of ending your marriage:
No matter how well-intentioned they might be, unless they are an experienced matrimonial attorney, you should not take advice from your friends and family. Even if they went through a divorce themselves, every case is unique and has a different set of facts and circumstances. Remember, your attorney knows the law. Don’t let your friends tell you what to do or how to do it during your divorce.
Don’t get greedy out of spite. At the end of the day, it won’t matter whether it was you or your spouse who initially filed for divorce. You will be judged by the manner in which you conduct yourself during the divorce proceedings.
Anything you post on social media can be misconstrued by the other side and used against you in a divorce. Even if you think your account has been set to private, your posts, messages, photos, and other people’s comments on your page can be used as evidence in court. If you do not think you can resist posting about the details of your divorce, it may be best to consider deactivating your account while your case is ongoing.
You should never badmouth your spouse or make disparaging comments about them in front of your children. Significantly, children often see themselves as part of both parents and doing so can impact their self-esteem and sense of self-worth. Don’t put your child in the middle of your conflict with your spouse or make them feel like they have to choose sides.
Paying child support late is one of the most critical “don’ts” in divorce. This is a severe legal violation that can not only harm your children, but also result in serious legal consequences, including wage garnishment, license suspension, contempt of court, and even jail time in certain situations.
It’s essential to be reasonable in a divorce. Fighting over minor items can drive up the costs of your case, cause delay, and create unnecessary conflict. Often, the costs associated with an emotional battle regarding a small piece of property exceed the value of it. In such cases, it may be wise to focus on negotiating the division of other assets instead.
A skilled family law attorney can best advise you regarding the divorce do’s and don’ts in your specific case. At Strickler, Platnick & Hatfield, we are dedicated to guiding our clients through the divorce process with compassion, knowledge, and diligence. Handling every case with the time and attention it deserves, we will work closely with you to ensure your rights are protected and the best possible outcome is achieved. To learn more about how we can help, contact Strickler, Platnick & Hatfield to schedule a consultation.
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