People often want to know what their rights are in a divorce. We prefer to talk about what their options and consequences are. The term "legal rights" is really a misnomer. The true question is: what decisions do you have to make, and what choices do you have? In essence, in a divorce, you have only three options—do nothing, reach agreement with your spouse, or get a stranger in judicial robes to make the decisions for you and your family. Now, we recognize that sometimes all these options are bad. Often in divorce, however the trick is to choose the least bad option.

Now what the "legal rights" question really asks is, "What can I do, what decisions do I have to make, and what will happen to me?" This is where early consultation with an experienced divorce lawyer is really important. That is because —truly—no two situations are alike. Every situation depends on many different facts. It is by seeing and helping to resolve many of these different factual situations that an attorney gets insight into what works and what doesn’t work, what the risks and rewards are, and what the process costs are that must be factored into the final decision.

And that really describes the role of a divorce attorney—to educate clients, help them understand their options and the potential consequences, and to weigh the benefits and drawbacks of all the options, so the client can make the best choices and decisions under the particular circumstances of their own unique case. Then the attorney, through special training and experience, helps the client implement those choices and decisions.